I’ve battled the fear of running out of money for much of my adult life, and being a business owner has only increased the pressure and uncertainty. Even when developing mental toughness and the self-discipline to face whatever challenges continually come my way, that sinking feeling in the pit of my stomach still occasionally hits me like a tidal wave.
Part of that is because I’m constantly pushing the limits of my comfort zone, like opening office locations in Los Angeles and Florida, and I am not reliant on everything else needing to go in a specific direction to feel safe after losing 90% of my business during the pandemic.
I’ve trained my brain to believe that “things always turn out well for me in the end,” and thus far, this has been my experience. That empowering belief keeps me motivated and productive, which ultimately produces the desired results, so it’s not just that I have an optimistic attitude. I also do the work which has helped me become internally secure.
My source of power originates from within and I am not reliant on everything else needing to go a specific direction to feel safe, since most of the time that doesn’t happen.
When you have an external sense of power, you rely on outside forces to make you feel powerful or secure. Fame, status, and money validate your worth, and when those items fail to meet your expectations, an identity crisis or mental breakdown ensues.
Over the last week, I had numerous conversations with business owners who shared how much they were struggling with anxiety, self-doubt, and imposter syndrome. Their businesses had taken a hit, which caused their self-confidence and relationships to suffer.
One person said, “I can’t stop thinking that I’m going to lose it all.”
Someone else described the feeling as “the terror,” which is a good description.
It’s like being crushed in a vice and not being able to breathe while staring at your laptop or lying in bed in the middle of the night. You keep mentally crunching the numbers and coming up short on paying bills or making payroll, which sends waves of panic through your body.
Frequently, it’s not even because of anything in particular that you did wrong. Sometimes, it’s the market or a world event that hurts the business. Other times, it’s a partner’s betrayal or an unexpected illness or death.
I’ve had to redesign my marketing or messaging, close offices, and create new revenue streams numerous times to adapt to the ever-changing marketplace.
Yet, after overcoming the anger, frustration, or self-pity from those losses, I chose to look at those situations as OPPORTUNITIES in disguise. Because of that, each setback became the start of my comeback, which resulted in new growth, both personally and financially.
Since my job is to understand and influence human behavior, I’ve always tried to discover where the source of that financial anxiety stems from, and more specifically, how I formed the unconscious belief that “I’m going to run out of money and then nobody will love me.”
Through my introspective self-analysis, I found a few significant moments where those beliefs likely formed. The first was very early. I was small and saw a movie on television where someone was getting beat up, and even though they were unconscious, the person kept beating them until they died.
That horrified me, and I got this idea stuck in my head that someone might do that to me. It made me so scared to stand up for myself, which then seemed to alert every bully in the area that I would be a good target.
Another occurrence happened when I was 12 years old, and my father was severely burned during an explosion at the steel mill where he worked. We went on welfare for a while, even though my grandfather had enough money to ensure our family was taken care of.
Two limiting beliefs formed in my brain without my consent or awareness. First, something bad could happen at any moment, and there’s nothing you can do about it, which is what happened.
Second, even if there is money around you, it won’t be enough, and you’ll feel humiliated. For many, humiliation or feeling like a loser or failure in front of their loved ones is scarier than running out of money.
When I asked myself, “What scares me the most about running out of money?” it wasn’t that I’d lose the house or be out on the street. Instead, the answer was, “It would mean that I am that loser kid everyone made fun of who was too scared to stand up for himself.”
After that realization, I went within and had an empowering conversation with the little kid inside me, reassuring him that he was safe, loved, resourceful, and powerful and that even if I lost everything, I’d still love and accept him forever.
Then, I felt the fear of humiliation evaporate and be replaced with a sense of lightness, which is a sign that the truth has been spoken.
In addition to upgrading your beliefs and sending love and reassurance to your inner child, these activities also lead to inner peace.
Power breathing in through your nose, down to your belly, and slowly exhaling while you gaze up towards the ceiling or sky will activate your Relaxation Response and help calm your brain down.
You can also go for a walk to loosen your body because a relaxed body creates a relaxed mind.
Talking through your fears with a friend, mentor, or coach who can support and reframe fear-based perspectives is also incredibly helpful.
Review your “Wins Journal,” to remind yourself of all the times when things DID work out. If you don’t know what a Wins Journal is, visit my blog on IndyHypnosis.com/blog
Repeat to yourself, “I am safe. I am loved. I will be OK.” Saying this to yourself during a walk is particularly effective.
Financial scarcity will always be a threat until you master your mind and shift to an abundance mentality. Even then, continually strengthening your thinking is a must.
🙂 Tim Shurr
***If you are having difficulty freeing yourself from the fear of running out of money, watch this “Inner Millionaire” Master Class and upgrade from a scarcity to an abundance mindset: https://timshurr.mykajabi.com/millionaire-maker-replay